Big Brother Craze

In light of the end of the year, and the excitement of a new season looming on the horizon, I thought I’d join some of the other 451ers who are putting together top ten lists.

In putting together my favorite Survivor moments, and planning to do this one too, I discovered that it might be very difficult for me to break it down and limit it to JUST 10 - there were SO MANY moments that made me crack up over the Big Brother 8 season! So then I thought maybe I’d just go through the old posts, and see what appealed to me. I found the previous author’s “Open Letter to the BB8 Houseguests” post - and lo, an idea was born. Let’s see how well the BB8 Houseguests followed her advice, shall we?!

1. While you’re in the house, the following things will be true:
The feeds are on. You are being watched by thousands of fans. Don’t ask if the feeds are running, or if the “internet” is on. They are, and it is.

Apparently, the BB8 Houseguests missed this memo completely. I lost count of how many times people asked if the feeds were on… and then there was Amber.

2. If you pick your nose, squeeze your zits in the bathroom mirror, pick at your face, or do anything else that may be construed as “gross” on a regular basis, feed watchers will pick up on it and make fun of you for it.

Dustin, the public nose picker. Dick, the fart and spit machine. Daniele, the zit picker. Amber the belly rubber “I can only do this in front of you, Jameka, since we’re so close…” Yeah, her and millions of fans…. A wealth of bad habits were seen, and made fun off!

3. Don’t think that you can do stuff behind the scenes and then blame the editing later. The live feeds are, indeed, live.

One word: Amber.

4. Having a sense of humor is good.

Kail, Kail, Kail. I think she would have gone a LOT farther if she had just loosened up a little. Even Jameka had fun with the Donatos - and she was just as much a Bible thumper as Kail! Relax and loosen up a little, and remember to SMILE… this is a GAME…

5. Constant complaining and lounging around doing nothing is not good.

“I haaaaaaaaate thiiiiiiiiisssssssss. I wanna go hooooooooooome. I haaaate these peeeeeeople…. Its so FRUUUUUUUSTRAAAAAAAAAATINGGGGG!” Oh, Daniele. Good thing Daddy played the hard parts of the game for you, huh?

6. We want to be entertained. Be interesting and you’ll have fans when you leave the house.

THANK YOU DICK, for remembering this! Love him or hate him, his late night conversations with the camera made the cost of the feeds worth it. He let us in on what he was thinking, he never held back, and we had something to watch in the wee hours of the morning because of it. At least SOMEONE listened to Carrie’s advice!

7. If someone wins the America’s Choice votes, you can assume that they’re popular.

Poor Eric. He got the advantage of knowing who was popular through the votes, and it certainly baffled him at times! He also knew when folks were upset with him, or simply determined to drag him down. Poor guy - he had the hardest game to play, to date. I do hope they let him back again to play his OWN game on his OWN terms for the next Allstars.

And don’t even get me started on Amber and how everyone loved her… I wish we HAD done an America’s choice, just so she learned differently before coming out of the house…

– And did any of them follow the preparation guidelines as set forth by Carrie?

8. Also, to help you prepare for the summer, start doing the following immediately:
Get your hands on as many episodes of prior seasons as you can and watch them. Watch them again. Learn from them. Read as many live feed reports online as you can find. Pay special attention to Season 6, and make note of the actions of the “Friendship.” You want to avoid all of these actions.

For a season full of fans, there were some REALLY stupid moves made. I think for the most part they watched, but they forgot the very important last line - LEARN. Whoops!

Everyone HATED the ‘Friendship’ alliance… yet the LNC had moments of Friendship-ness, and who could forget the banner declaring them the Nerd Herd… They clearly missed the AVOIDANCE again…

9. Learn how to cook. Memorize recipes that you can make with plain oatmeal and as few other ingredients as possible. Likewise, learn how to operate a grill without setting anyone or anything near you aflame.

The tears. The Skelatore. The whining. The… gaining weight on slop? It’s just uber-plain oatmeal, guys! SUCK IT UP!

10. Practice your endurance. Put yourself in odd positions, hanging from poles or monkey bars or anything you can find, and stay there as long as you can. Have your friends pour ice water on you, or try to tempt you with things like pizza or money. Don’t give in.

You KNOW there’s gonna be endurance comps. Involving water, and temptations. How bad do you REALLY want it? PREPARE!

And, a bonus #11:

One other piece of advice: don’t sing. When you sing, we get flames or the fish tank or whatever evil object the powers that be have chosen for this season on the feeds. We don’t enjoy that.

It took me all of 10 minutes, in this, my first year of the feeds, to be annoyed with the constant “Houseguests, Please Stop Singing!” announcements. If you can’t live without singing? DON’T go into the house! Unless, of course, you’re Jessica and you are making up the Boo-yah Boo-yah song. That was too cute for words!

So there you have it. Different Houseguests - Same Mistakes. Dare we hope for better with BB9? Are we in for more of the same? What would YOU tell the houseguests if you had the chance?